This will be my focus for January.
Too many times I think I have
a conversation in my head that
goes something like this:
"This sucks."
"Why is this happening to me?"
"Why can't my life just be easy for once?"
"Does He really hate me?"
"Why can't I just do what I want"
"Why do I never get to have pretty things"
"I can't handle this"
"I give up!"
Okay, I lied.
I don't THINK I have those
constant, on-going, TOXIC
thoughts...
I KNOW IT.
I know it too well,
and even while I'm having them,
I know they need to stop.
JUST STOP.
So my focus at least for January
and hopefully through the year
will be to stop the
toxic monologue
in my brain.
I follow a podcast through
iTunes that offers guided
meditation.
One of the things the lady says
that is supremely helpful for me
is that beginners mistakenly
think that the goal of meditation
is to stop thoughts
and just
"be".
But she says in her meditations:
"thoughts don't matter"
and
"do not get involved in making up a
story about your thoughts"
When my toxic train get's going,
that's exactly what I am doing!
I am making up a story about those
negative thoughts...
telling myself God doesn't love me
or God wants me to suffer
or God is unreasonable and expects
WAY too much from me...
But if I take away the story,
I'm just left with thoughts.
And if the thoughts just aren't TRUE,
then they are not from God.
Because God is Truth.
If I take away the story,
I'm just left with thoughts.
If the thoughts aren't LOVING,
then they are not from God.
Because God is Love.
If I take away the story,
and I am left with TRUTHFUL,
LOVING thoughts,
eventually, I will become
a truthful and loving person
Because
As water reflects a face,
so a man's heart [thoughts] reflects the man.
Proverbs 27:19
...as water reflects my face,
so my thoughts reflect who I am...
or, to be cute and new-agey...
What you think about you bring about!
Just Amy
No comments:
Post a Comment